bottoms (2023) dir. emma seligman
i've only ever come out to one friend back in high school. it was valentine's day and it was a conversation in an old sedan. it was also a confession, because i had a crush on the person i came out to.
before then, i'd only ever sneaked secret watches of what little gay girl representation i could get my hands on at the time. there was that short-lived kissing scene in jennifer's body (2009), and then the measly depiction of lesbians in the much-loved sitcom, friends.
(look, i know there was more. a lot more. but those were all i knew at the time because i didn't have a lesbian friend until college.)
even as i embraced my identity as a lesbian in a new country, i never really had to come out. not in the sense that coming out scenes in queer books, movies, and series look or feel like, anyway.
i really liked bottoms, and i really like watching queer friendships. i know a lot of the verbiage when it comes to being queer or gay is love-related and love-based. same love, love wins, love who you want, etc. and these certainly mean something, but i think what i really like about there being more gay girls onscreen is seeing the different kinds of gay girl friendship there are.
i'm so happy i made gay and queer and trans friends before my 20s. i wish my preteen self could see that. could know that there was all this to look forward to. wish there was a way the me right now could go back and tell my preteen self all the cool, sad, happy, and gay things i've done since those days.
i don't know. i really liked bottoms.